The Gift of Reverence: Being An Help Meet for Your Husband

How and why God calls you to reverence your husband & ways to show reverence.

Masculinity and biblical patriarchy are a perfect gift from God. As I learn more about each of these creations from a biblical worldview, I’m filled with pure awe for how and why men were created.

I’m also deeply saddened by how the perversion of biblical gender roles in our society has destabilized marriages, erected walls of pain and secrecy where intimacy ought to be sown, and eroded the foundation of entire family lineages.

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Our society has convinced the masses that masculinity and patriarchy are inherently toxic and must be abolished. In truth, they are an essential piece of the foundation of a strong family built in alignment with God’s perfect design.

“Female empowerment,” in truth, falsely permits women to alienate their husbands emotionally and physically from their families and uses expressions of masculinity as the grounds to do it.

I could go on, but I digress. This post is not to break down the flaws of feminism, but to explore what Paul the Apostle meant when he said wives should reverence their husbands.

“Nevertheless, let every one of you in particular so love his wife even as himself; and the wife see that she reverence her husband.”

— Ephesians 5:33 (emphasis added)

According to the KJV dictionary, this is what it means to reverence:

bashfulness that is (towards men) modesty or (towards God) awe

— Strongs Definition

As well as:

a sense of shame or honour, modesty, bashfulness, reverence, regard for others, respect

— Thayers Definition

I interpret this as an entire demeanour I’m to have toward my husband. It strikes me as being awe-struck to the point of wanting to respect and honour him in every way possible, especially as being an help meet for him.

(I’d LOVE to hear your interpretation! I am always grateful and open to receiving the wisdom of other women, too!)

In addition, I see in the verse that I’m called to show reverence for my husband. I see this as an essential foundation for the Godly intimacy of our marriage.

He is the only one I show this to, which deepens my respect for him. This also deepens our intimacy with a dynamic that is only shared between him and I.

Upon learning of my role to reverence him, I realized that in order to truly do so, I’d first need to understand who my husband is, and why.

The answer starts in Genesis and takes shape throughout the entire Bible.

This has been a long, ongoing study where I routinely come back to Scripture and prayer for better understanding of my husband and our roles in marriage.

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For this article, to build the case for reverence and how this dynamic serves our marriages and fulfilment, we’ll lean on the basic premise of what a man is:

“And the LORD God formed man of the dust of the ground, and breathed into his nostrils the breath of life; and man became a living being soul.”

— Genesis 2:7 (emphasis added)

And why man was created:

“Then God said, “Let Us make man in Our image, according to Our likeness; let them have dominion over the fish of the sea, over the birds of the air, and over the cattle, over all the earth and over every creeping thing that creeps on the earth.”

— Genesis 1:26 (emphasis added)

How his creation is relevant to mine:

“And the LORD God said, It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him an help meet for him.”

— Genesis 2:18 (emphasis added)

And how I was created:

“And the LORD God caused a deep sleep to fall upon Adam, and he slept: and he took one of his ribs, and closed up the flesh instead thereof;

And the rib, which the LORD God had taken from man, made he a woman, and brought her unto the man.

And Adam said, This is now bone of my bones, and flesh of my flesh: she shall be called Woman, because she was takenout of Man.”

— Genesis 2:21-23

With this information, we know that:

• God made man to be a living breathing soul

• In His likeness

• To have dominion over the fish of the sea, birds of the air, cattle, earth, and every creeping thing that creeps the earth

• Woman was made from the man, for the man, to be an help meet for him

Reverence, then, is essential to our marriage dynamic.

It has often been said that in order for a marriage to thrive, men need respect and women need love.

We can see the truth in this throughout all of Ephesians chapter 5. However, it’s summarized beautifully in the verse I mentioned earlier:

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